Tuesday, January 26, 2010

I love The Message

Here's a passage I came across on YouVersion. I learn something new every time I read it.

25 And it’s trouble ahead if you’re satisfied with yourself.
Your self will not satisfy you for long. And it’s trouble ahead if you think life’s all fun and games. There’s suffering to be met, and you’re going to meet it.
26 “There’s trouble ahead when you live only for the approval of others, saying what flatters them, doing what indulges them. Popularity contests are not truth contests—look how many scoundrel preachers were approved by your ancestors! Your task is to be true, not popular.27 “To you who are ready for the truth, I say this: Love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst.28 When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer for that person.29 If someone slaps you in the face, stand there and take it. If someone grabs your shirt, giftwrap your best coat and make a present of it.30 If someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life. No more tit-for-tat stuff. Live generously.31 “Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them!32 If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that.33 If you only help those who help you, do you expect a medal? Garden-variety sinners do that.34 If you only give for what you hope to get out of it, do you think that’s charity? The stingiest of pawnbrokers does that.35 “I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return. You’ll never—I promise—regret it. Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst.36 Our Father is kind; you be kind.37 “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. Don’t condemn those who are down; that hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people; you’ll find life a lot easier.38 Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity.”39 He quoted a proverb: “‘Can a blind man guide a blind man?’ Wouldn’t they both end up in the ditch?40 An apprentice doesn’t lecture the master. The point is to be careful who you follow as your teacher.41 “It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own.

42 Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this I-know-better-than-you mentality again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your own part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.

Work the Words into Your Life

43 “You don’t get wormy apples off a healthy tree, nor good apples off a diseased tree.44 The health of the apple tells the health of the tree. You must begin with your own life-giving lives.45 It’s who you are, not what you say and do, that counts. Your true being brims over into true words and deeds.46 “Why are you so polite with me, always saying ‘Yes, sir,’ and ‘That’s right, sir,’ but never doing a thing I tell you?47 These words I speak to you are not mere additions to your life, homeowner improvements to your standard of living. They are foundation words, words to build a life on.48 “If you work the words into your life, you are like a smart carpenter who dug deep and laid the foundation of his house on bedrock. When the river burst its banks and crashed against the house, nothing could shake it; it was built to last.

49 But if you just use my words in Bible studies and don’t work them into your life, you are like a dumb carpenter who built a house but skipped the foundation. When the swollen river came crashing in, it collapsed like a house of cards. It was a total loss.”

Sunday, January 24, 2010

I'm growing up

I'm gonna be working part time at Carmike Cinema this semester and trying to find another job.

Let's get to the interesting spiritual stuff. I think cause I'm not in class this semester, I'm going to have an awesome time developing spiritually. I'll have so much more time to use toward studying the Word and stuff... this is such a great opportunity. Pray for me that I would look at this positively and really develop while I have so much time to devote to it.

If I do get another job then things could get a little crazy but I still think with no studying it's not gonna be that bad.

Hopefully Olive Garden will pick me up as a table busser (someone who comes after and cleans).

If anyone wants to jam sometime let me know.

You know it's crazy but I feel like getting a girlfriend used to be something I obsess about but now it's not too bad. Sure it's on my mind... but I'm much more serious. I realize that I am looking for my wife here, not a short-term lover. I see past it, and I know it would only end badly. In order to be there for my wife the way I need to be, want to be, I would have to be a lot more grown up at heart. Marrying someone is serious stuff! Matt Chandler is right... we're not created just to have sex with a BODY! It's about having sex with a soul. In a sense. There is a "knowing" of each other that is intimate and two become one. Two souls come together for comfort and pleasure and procreation and other reasons. It is SO much more than the world thinks it is. The world doesn't know what to think of sex. It can't make up its mind.

So yeah. I really want to get dead serious about this and grow up. Not in the sense that I want my wife and I want her right now... but I'm ready to be where God wants me to be. And I want to be at that point. And God puts opportunities there, I firmly believe that. I live my life one day at a time and I don't get caught up in future plans because it's all in motion. But I do wish I could be more goal-oriented, and that's part of the spiritual development that needs to happen this semester. I'm starting to become more of a man and stand up for myself when people try to use me.

So pray for me. Pray that I would pray. Pray that I would love Christ more and more. Pray that I would crave spiritual challenges. And pray that I can pay off my chiropractic bill that I let pile up by accident. Let's just say, that's going to be REALLY hard.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Matt Chandler's podcasts

I have been hooked on this guy ever since I heard his sermon on God and Sex, which if you scroll down, you can click the link and listen to it. I posted on that a while ago. Today I have been searching iTunes for podcasts that I can download and listen to periodically and really, I had no idea where to start. Who to listen to. I wasn't sure what I was seeking for.

Looking at what I have just heard, I would have to say that the sovereignty of God made me listen to this very podcast. It was exactly what I needed to hear and I have been convicted. I remembered how Matt C was a funny guy with a lot of wisdom and a great way of punctually wording things (far greater than myself), and I looked at the list of sermons he had on iTunes store for free. I saw a series called The Path that has like 11 sermons, each an hour long.

I have been told exactly what I need to know. Many of my questions have been answered. And many faults I didn't know I have have been laid bare. I realized that I have been metaphorically "working out" with God instead of "training". Working out involves going to the gym and doing benchpress/bicep curls and leaving. Training involves you standing there at the plate while your baseball coach says "No, hold it a certain way, like this, not like that, but like this, and move your feet here and do that." It is step by step progression to righteousness, to be more in line with how things are designed to be. The Christian life is not a door you enter and you're done. It is a training process in which you love the Lord and are naturally drawn to Him (the Word) and you regularly, committedly read it because you want to. It is step by step, and corrective. So what I've been doing (ok, now I'll read a little Galatians cause I'm struggling with works-righteousness lately or some 1 Corinthians would help with this or that) is not training.

Another question I had answered was this: Why does God not give us a list of what to do in every situation so that we'd just know and life would be easier? The answer is this: We would all run straight toward legalism and our hearts would never be transformed. Those who couldn't do the list would be devastated, and those who could follow it, like a flow chart, would be self-righteous and impossible to be around.

The third point hit me the hardest. I learned that my longing for another person's wisdom via podcast is actually weakening my relationship with the Word. Living vicariously and learning that way through another person is a sad thing because I will never love the Lord like the person I'm listening to does. I'm not fighting and struggling through whatever circumstances it took for them to achieve that wisdom. If a person told me about how much they love an individual, it wouldn't make me all of a sudden love that person. But if I got to know this person (God) through the manifestation of Himself that is His Word, which I'll say again is literally Himself, then we would go through the arduous process it is when you love someone. You go through anything for that person. And it hardens you and it teaches you. So that when someone talks about God you won't have that faint sense of who He is while you stroke your beard and go "ah, yes..." as you ponder the abstract.

So now, I'm going to find a plan, like Jason said, and dedicate myself to reading it. But first I'm gonna ask myself why I'm doing this. And I'm going to end here because I can't really describe that except in my heart and it's a conversation for God and me.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Crazy Love is challenging

"She gives me love, love, love, love... crazy love."

Sorry. I like that song.

Crazy Love (the book) is hitting me like a ton of bricks. I literally feel short of breath. "Lukewarm people don't really want to be saved from their sin; only from the penalty of their sin. They don't genuinely hate sin and aren't truly sorry for it; they're merely sorry because God is going to punish them."

Francis Chan has a whole list of Scripture quotes that refer to people to don't really love Christ, they just have whitewashed fronts and go through the motions. Deep down I do love Him but I've buried my longing and need for Him under piles of good works.

Let's just say that I've been hit where it hurts and it feels good. Which doesn't happen often.

These quotes he lists are ones I've heard before but for some reason my ears were stopped up compared to now. The top quote really hit me the most. Which of course isn't Scripture but it's him saying the truth.

"I know your deeds; you have a reputation of being alive, but you are dead" (Rev 3:1)

Ok. Now I don't think I'm spiritually dead and that I'm a fake going to Hell. Deep down I really love what is good and righteous. But this is a serious situation for me. I want to question myself deeply and test myself in the fire and come out harder, more mature, more dead to sin. Please pray for me that this comes to pass. I want to figure out this mystery that is so above my comprehension.

I'm not gonna talk about it anymore because it's useless to talk about something that is supposed to be a heart experience. It only distracts. Let me know what you think about it, if you've read this book or not. I encourage you to.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Update 1/10/10

Hey all. I've been super busy... last semester I had to finish out strong for graduation... and did well. I have a 3.302 GPA. I also just studied for only a week to prepare for the GRE and made a 570/800 on the Verbal section and a 490/800 on the Math. That's actually not too bad from what I understand. I did better on the real GRE than I did on the practice one! And what's weirder, on the real one I guessed a whole lot, and didn't study after I took the practice one. Apparently someone's prayers for me worked.

I listened to a podcast because my sexy man friend Brad Christian recommended it. It completely changed the way I think about my future and my wife and for the better, I must say. I have a lot more clarity and the fear of the unknown is largely gone. Here's the link:

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/1846697/Culture%20&%20Theology_%20God%20and%20Sex%201.mp3


I hope you listen to it even though it's two hours. But because Matt Chandler is a funny guy, it will be two hours of laughing/intense listening. You won't regret it. And it is for BOTH SEXES.

This has just been a difficult time... not in a bad way... although I admit having back and body pain is scary. I have plantar fasciitis, a painful condition in my feet that basically means I have this stuff in the bottom of my feet, a web of interconnective tissue, that gets cramped up and develops knots. Now imagine walking around with that. When I don't have my insoles in my shoes, it's murder. I can't go anywhere without them.

I think if I'm regular about stretching, and if I get a few foot massages I should be able to work the problem out over 3-6 months. MAYBE.

On a lighter note, I'm excited about my future, and I hope that I get accepted into graduate school here at ECU. I promise to update the blog regularly, perhaps once every two days.

Saturday, January 2, 2010